Manny Pascual Cuevas On: The “Investment” Mindset: When Filipino Parents See Children as Money Makers

The incredible success of Carlos Yulo shines a light on a harsh truth in some Filipino families: children are expected to be “investments” or money-makers. But is this mindset healthy or fair?

Carlos Yulo is a Filipino artistic gymnast known for making history as the Philippines' most successful gymnast. He became the first Filipino male gymnast to win a medal at the World Artistic Gymnastics Championships, earning a bronze in the floor exercise in 2018. Yulo's rise continued as he won two gold medals at the 2024 Paris Olympics in the floor exercise and vault events, making him a two-time Olympic champion and the first Filipino to win multiple Olympic gold medals. Throughout his career, he has collected numerous accolades including six World Championship medals, ten Asian Championship titles, and nine Southeast Asian Games gold medals.

The "Investment" Mindset: Where Filipino Families Get It Wrong About Children

Carlos Yulo’s awe-inspiring rise as a world-class gymnast is a story of passion, grit, and talent. Yet, it also sheds light on a painful reality many Filipino youth face — being seen by their own families as an “investment” or a means to financial survival. The phrase “Nag-anak para guminhawa ang buhay namin” (“We had children to have a better life”) captures a mindset so deeply ingrained in Filipino culture that it’s often unquestioned. But where exactly does this way of thinking go wrong, and why is it harmful?

When Children Become Commodities

The first major problem with this mindset is that it reduces children to sources of income or financial leverage, rather than recognizing them as individuals with their own aspirations and emotions. This commodification overlooks the basic human need for unconditional love and acceptance. Children aren’t factories designed to produce money — they are people who deserve respect, freedom, and emotional fulfillment.

Filipinos, especially in lower-income families or overseas worker households, often face immense economic hardships. The pressure to survive and improve family finances is very real. However, turning this survival instinct into a norm where children’s worth is measured primarily by their financial output creates a toxic environment. It limits children’s growth to narrow achievements that satisfy familial economic pressures rather than encouraging diverse dreams.

The Emotional Toll on Filipino Youth

Filipino children and young adults subjected to this mindset often suffer hidden wounds that don’t show up in bank balances:

• Mental health struggles

  Anxiety, depression, and feelings of worthlessness can arise when a child’s efforts aren’t enough or when success feels dictated rather than chosen.

  
  

• Strained parent-child relationships

  When love is conditional upon financial contribution, trust and emotional intimacy weaken. Many grow up feeling like they have to “perform” to maintain family approval.

  
  

• Suppression of true desires

  Many Filipino youth abandon their own passions and dreams to fit into this narrow role, leading to long-term dissatisfaction and regret.

  
  

• Loss of individuality

  The child’s identity becomes entangled with the family’s economic goals, eroding their sense of self.

Why This Mindset Should Not Be Normalized

Filipino society’s culture of sacrifice is admirable, but when sacrifice becomes exploitation, the line has been crossed. Normalizing the idea that children exist primarily to “pay off” a family’s hardships ignores their right to well-being and personal growth.

This mindset perpetuates cycles of toxic family dynamics where emotional needs are unmet and unconditional support is scarce. It can create environments where children feel trapped, obligated, and unheard. These experiences shape not just individuals, but also future generations who may continue this pattern unconsciously.

Breaking Free: Your Right to Healthy Boundaries

One of the most empowering lessons young Filipinos can learn is that you have the right to set boundaries — even if it means distancing yourself from family members who harm your emotional health. Cutting ties or creating space is not a betrayal but an act of self-preservation and healing.

This is especially important in cultures like the Philippines where familial expectations are extreme and loyalty is expected at all costs. Choosing mental wellness and healthier relationships is not selfish; it is necessary for your survival and happiness.

Tips for Navigating Toxic Family Expectations

Recognize your value beyond money: Your worth as a person is never tied only to what you can provide financially.

• Communicate your feelings

  Express your needs calmly and clearly; sometimes family doesn’t realize the emotional impact their expectations have.

  
  

• Seek external support

  Counselors, mentors, or peer support groups can provide guidance and validation.

  
  

• Practice self-care

  Schedule time for activities that nourish your mind and soul to build resilience.

  
  

• Be patient with yourself

  Breaking cultural patterns is difficult and takes time.

Manny Pascual Cuevas: Offering Support and Healing

Manny Pascual Cuevas understands these cultural pressures intimately and offers counseling services tailor-made for Filipino youth wrestling with these issues. His compassionate approach helps young people build healthy self-worth, set boundaries confidently, and heal from emotional wounds caused by toxic family dynamics.

Final Thoughts: Redefining Family and Success

Filipino families deserve to celebrate children for who they are — with all their unique talents, dreams, and emotions — not just as financial contributors. Changing this narrative is tough but necessary for healthier, happier generations.

If you feel weighed down by family expectations or trapped in toxic cycles, remember: you are allowed to prioritize your mental health and wellbeing. Support is available, and healing is possible.